Good stuff

Makes us wonder...

Games Draw

Hello Blues, below is the draw for this season:

16 Nov
6:50 Paddy's vs Man & Woman City

23 Nov
9:00 Boca Seniors vs Man & Woman City

30 Nov
9:05 Booma vs Man & Woman City

07 Dec
8:20 Raven vs Man & Woman City

14 Dec
8:20 Strickers vs Man & Woman City

25 Jan
6:00 Shoot to trill vs Man & Woman City

01 Feb
6:50 Paddy's vs Man & Woman City

08 Feb
9:00 WOW fc vs Man & Woman City

15 Feb
7:35 Semi Pro vs Man & Woman City

22 Feb
9:00 Joma vs Man & Woman City

01 Mar
7:35 Dukes vs Man & Woman City

08 Mar
Quater Finals - TBA

15 Mar
Semi Finals - TBA

22 Mar
The big mama Finals - TBA

Defensive Frailties

Today's preview begins with a modest statistical analysis of a worrying trend that threatens to plague the Sky Blues.

Spectacular capitulations have been the theme of their most recent matches. After almost losing from a seemingly unassailable position two weeks ago they went all the way in their disastrous defeat last week.

For a team scoring an average of 11.5 goals per match (an admittedly inflated statistic due to their large win in the opening competitive round) an even 2-2 win loss record leads to the inevitable conclusion: their defense is too porous.

The loss of the experienced Weaver after barely a minute had elapsed last Tuesday certainly did not help their quest for defensive surety and his manager's assertions that the key stopper may be weeks away from match fitness can hardly improve the outlook of disgruntled City supporters.

At today's media briefing Kevpello admitted that the Blues "have not settled as a defensive unit" and also conceded that their "use of the ball could have been better" in recent times.

"It's my responsibility to turn this around" the manager asserted. "There is really no excuse for conceding more than five goals in a match, and we've done it three times in four matches!"

He was however quick to point out the contrast at the other end of the field adding "Demarchi and the Jacksons have been in goal scoring form; Robin and Punton have been getting into scoring positions and producing plenty of shots. More goals will come. Hirt's goal the other day was well taken too and he's looking dangerous, with a range of passing and good finishing. We just need to organise ourselves a little better and tighten up in defense."

He dismissed the chances of signing of ex-Farsenal star Andrew Lorimer as "dead", who set tongues wagging with a fully uniformed appearance prior to the match last week. It is thought that contract negotiations hit a last minute impasse as the player took exception to the league's signing on fee.

lessons to learn

We had more shoots, more control of the game, more free kicks, more dribbles, more magic, more admiration from the crowd and the referee, we were frendlier, we were much better looking (so my wife always says), we smelt better, but one things we had less... goals. And that was all that mattered.

Well…we started with more goals but then…disaster! Like an old Batman movies, the onomatopoeias keep coming. It was a sequence of “Bams!” “Kapows!” and “Whacks!” that even Robin “the boy wonder” could not save us. I'm still not sure about why it happened but as far as my eyes could see it was a pandemonium…people running everywhere, pregnant ladies running for shelter, women in their prams protecting their babies, grown up man crying, a group of punks running to save their lives… it was horrible to watch.

After refleting a bit I came to one conclusion: The blues lost because someone spilled mud in our way" .In 3 minutes we went from Godzilla’s to a group of scared ants that were following a queue. Once mud hit our path we wondered around the court in search for that signal that would bring us back to our positions. Unfortunately, when we got the signal and found the line again, the pic nic was already over.

In all honesty, we didn’t play well as a team tonight. We lacked that: “Where are we going today?” before the game chat and the “How can we get to the picnic now that there is that huge pile of mud on the way” during half time. We maybe need to arrive a little earlier so we can make a plan and organise the queue. During half time maybe we should congregate together and chat about the path to reach the pic nic safely. This way maybe there will be a huge chocolate mud cake at the end of the rug for all of us and less “Kapows!”

Press Conference

The media frenzy that took Man & woman city by storm this week, came to an end this morning during the blues press conference. During the week the angry club supporters were questioning the Manager Kevin Jackson Capello selection choice in playing Demarchi and Weaver after the allegations that those boys are unfit party boy who have no commitment to training and respect for their colleagues.

This morning Capello rectified his selection by declaring to the angry media mob: “ Demarchi might look like a whale, but if he is a whale he is a killer whale. Not one of those we see at sea world…despite that Tilikum of course. No Sir…Demarchi is more like the killer whales we see on the National Geographic channel. The ones who play with the prey before eating them.” He also declared about Weaver “ Weavers beavers…every week is the same thing. You ask about Weaver’s fitness and if he is not drunk. Weaver might’ve looked like catching a chook when the ball went under his leg in the second Goal, but I tell you one thing: Weaver is not a chook catcher!...that’s why the ball went in.”

Answering questions about Demarchi’s physical and mental capabilities Capello backed up his player once more: “Look, Demarchi is scientifically, biologically and ergonomically fit!”

But the questions didn’t end there. When Demarchi and Weaver were asked about their party behaviour and late nights they replied “Listen, We are here to play futsal and talk about futsal. If you want ask questions about party and drinking let’s go to Paddy’s. We are a professionals that know how to separate leisure from pleasure.”

During the press conference pictures along with graphs were shown of Demarchi’s performance in court highlighting his best belly moves.




The storm has passed and the big question will only be answer next week at 9:05….again

Roller Coaster Victory

After failing to score the first goal of the game for the first time this season, Man & Woman City build a match winning lead from two goals down, only to see their blushes saved with a goal line clearance with less than two minutes to play.

The absence of a Punton on the team sheet was the only change as the blues arrived

confident from their 22 goal demolition job of the whites last week, although a quick glance at tonight's opposition revealed more muscular and male rivals. Any concerns were well founded as after surviving some early pressure the team in yellow managed to stab home the game's opening goal. The blues' problems doubled shortly afterwards with a mix up between Demarchi and injured goalkeeper Weaver gifting the yellows a two goal cushion.

Incidentally, the term yellow is applied loosely, as even the most liberal interpretations of the spectrum could not have construed the black and green adornments of some of City's foes as remotely in tune with their peers. What was in tune however was a blue comeback, as City refused to panic, building their play with deliberate passing. Their patience was rewarded as Hirt and Robin's attacking influence grew and Demarchi kept up his fine run of scoring, delivering four unanswered goals to reverse the two goal margin to their favour at half time.

Demarchi scores the Blues' fifth

Their competitors scored an early goal in the second half, igniting furious celebrations. So fired up were they that following a quick City reply they scored a goal from the kick off. A bucket of cold water came in the form of a goal kick awarded by the referee who explained that as no one else had touched the ball, the goal did not count!

The blues were struggling to maintain their passing supremacy and were often confused by their opponent's runs.

The structure which had seen them excel in the previous two weeks was deserting them, but that didn't stop their USA international robbing her mark, dribbling from inside her own half and finishing with aplomb. A quick brace from her husband had seemingly killed off the game at 8-3, but in a bizarre end to the match the blues almost threw away a certain victory.

Laura Jackson celebrates her brilliant solo goal, City's sixth

One yellow goal rekindled comeback belief and quickly two became three and then, in a calamitous display of defending Kevin Jackson failed left his mark unchecked to side foot past Weaver from two yards. At 8-7, the Yellows then had two minutes in which to salvage a draw or even snatch an unlikely victory. The blues, now looking desperately tired defended doggedly, blocking chances and forcing free kicks.

It appeared that their moment had arrived to equalize, but with the defense unlocked and goalkeeper beaten, Kevin Jackson tracked back to turn a goal bound drive off the line for a corner. They were to come no closer, as Weaver then threw forward and Demarchi, Robin and Laura Jackson ensured the ball stayed in attacking territory.

"It feels like a loss" lamented Jackson post game. "To have such a commanding lead and concede so many goals at the end... still, a win's a win." Weaver was kind to his defense, who in contrast had not done him many favours. "It's pretty hard to stop them from four metres out" he observed charitably.

Asked how he felt after the match, City's leading goal scorer admitted to being "exhausted". Rumours that Demarchi was following in the footsteps of his countryman Robinho were dismissed by his agent as "rubbish". The Brazilian's exhaustion comes from working late nights, setting an off-field example that Robinho would do well to emulate.

Hirt was typically modest at the games' end, humbly accepting praise for his stellar performance. Robin was still unsatisfied with her finishing, rueing a couple of missed chances. Laura Jackson put her magnificent solo effort down to anger. "They would take it off me and make me look like an idiot, so I got mad." Given that her madness resulted in one of the highlights of the match, City supporters could be forgiven for hoping that future teams invoke her ire. In all, a well earned victory for the blues that lacked polish.

22

I must confess that I was expecting better opposition last night. At moments I felt like playing Need for Speed on xbox against my beautiful wife Bridge. By the time I'm crossing the finish line, she still stuck under a tree on the first corner. I go to the toilet, shave, have a shower, a meal, get ready for bed and she still there, under the tree.

But lets be honest. I felt sorry for the poor guys! I really did. The compassionate feelings started when we were 6 goals ahead, those feelings worsen and I felt really bad when the score turned into 12, not long after I was almost throwing the white towel deep deep embarrassed for them when the massacre reach 17, than the worst hit...we scored 19. Somehow, at that moment, the little man inside of me (whom I’ve been trying to hear more often) whispered: 20 is what separate good teams from super heroes. I was alive again! All the love dove sorry feelings I had went away like a thunder bolt. And it didn’t stop at 20, we still scored 2 more just in case the referee missed some in his counting.

It was a glorious 22 for the record books! And yes I am sorry for the poor Salomon Islan…I mean, whoever we played last night, but the little man also told me that time will heal their wounds but the 22 will stand high in history.

There were many lessons to be learned from last night, but two stands out for me:
1 - Lets listen more to the little man
2 - just play need for speed with Bridge if you have a lot of time in hands.

Before I go, I want say that last night it wasn’t all roses. We recorded our lowest crowd in history (even though this is our second game). It broke my heart to see our marvellous crowd reduced by 1/2 from last week’s match. Maybe next week we’ll have doubled the crowd again, all we need for that is 1 more. But thank you Caled (Mikes son) for being such a tremendous support to our team, although most of the time I looked you were reading the Harry Potter book. The 22 score is for you!

I leave you now with a video. It's the highest score in the FIFA Futsal World Cup...and we went one further.

'Twas the night before Wednesday

‘twas the night before Wednesday

And all came around

The teams were both stirring

The ref made his sound

The Jacksons had brought in

The jerseys with care

In hopes that a victory

Soon would be theirs.

The whistle was nestled

Tight in the ref’s yap

Just ‘fore the first goal in

By raf was then slapped

The New guy Zac Hirt wearing

Mistletoe green

In first half goalkeeping

kept it to just three

With pass from big raf

And footwork up front,

I knew those two goals

Just Had to be punt(on)!

Both Weaver and Karlee and

Caz on the bench

Had just settled down

Before the halftime switch

When out from the goalsquare

There rose such a clatter

T’was Mike’s run for glory

Though keeper, no matter

Away to the goal laura

Ran like a flash

To polish another one

Easily past

Kev J from the back line

Wrapped each pass with bows

And sent them to forwards

Who made them great goals

More rapid than reindeer the

Goals they all came

Now Karlee, now, Laura,

Now let’s call the game

Soon they all gave up and

The foes felt defeat

But I wouldn’t blame them,

Our goals on repeat

The Ref checked his watch

To the teams gave a whistle

And away we all flew like

The down of a thistle

We all there exclaimed

With our smiles so bright

Good game to you all

And to all a good night

Blues Cruise

An avalanche of goals including an audacious long range effort from goalkeeper Weaver got City's regular season off to the best possible start. Unlike the US national budget, their goal difference is firmly back in the black as they convincingly disposed of their opponents who had much fewer Y chromosomes than last week's rivals by a score of 4-22.

The ease with which Demarchi dispatched the first goal of the match was an ominous sign of things to come for the folks in white, although they put in a creditable performance to half time, the 3-6 score line accurately reflecting what had been a relatively close contest.

New recruit Zac Hirt certainly hurt the likelihood of City's opponents adding to their total, parrying the shots the whites could muster. Mike Weaver took up the goalkeeping challenge in the second half and provided an added dimension to the position, scoring a magnificent goal. Collecting the ball in his own area, he dribbled several players to beyond halfway and, ignoring the errant assertions of his bench that the goalkeeper is not allowed beyond the centre line took a few more steps before lashing a low drive into the far corner. As referee Finlay asserted: "the goal keeper can do whatever he jolly well likes", putting Jackson firmly in his place.

Laura scored a nice pair of children's boots at Rebel Sport during the week and used them to come to grips with her lack of traction. Unfortunately, the opposing goalkeeper couldn't come to grips with any of her shots on goal as Laura contributed amply to the inflated score board. The blues' other debutant in Punton began in style, taking advantage of the space created by Demarchi's ability to draw defenders and positioning herself well to fire home two well taken goals within the first ten minutes. She was typically modest afterwards, offering the formula "all you have to do is get in the right spot and it rebounds in off you" as the reason behind her success.

Karlee Robin also opened her scoring account and once it was open, deposited several goals therein. "My finishing was a bit off tonight" she said, sending a veiled warning to future opponents. After being about as accurate as Buddy Franklin for the first five minutes, Demarchi got into his stride, delighting the crowd with sublime foot skills and walking countless goals home. A late highlight was an effortless flick and shot on the turn which thundered past the hapless and by this stage disinterested keeper, although when he saw the highlights Gianluigi Buffon was heard to mutter that "even I would have had trouble with that one".

Rumours that Mike is going to Rebel against the slippery surface are gaining strength as he was seen casting a discerning eye over his teammate's footwear. If he can dribble an entire team and score from halfway in old cross trainers, he will be a formidable force when fitted with fairly frictional footwear.

All in all, a comfortable evening for the people who wear blue, who no doubt face sterner tests in the future.

Match preview

Rafael Demarchi
Tonight the curtains will open again for another spectacle of magic tricks, illusion and special moves that challenge logic, gravity and I would even dare to say faith. Some need to see it to believe… when others are very happy not to come at all.
But tonight the show will be different as the competition starts and the pressure is now real. Will the mighty fall? Will we see more delicious moves from Demarchi or just the result driven professionalism that is killing the joga bonito so many Brazilians believe? Will the Jacksons have more grip and continue the form finding the back of the net in many more occasions? Will Robin see a real challenge against adult males or will she continue to demolish them like a giant stomping on daisies? Will “Wall” Weaver continue his form and maybe pass one from the keeper this time? And will “Monkey Magic” keeper Jimbow continue his astute moves, flying towards the ball like a hungry monkey after bananas?

9:05 we will start to get the answers… may the fight for futsal supremacy begin!

Patchy beginnings

After weeks of off field drama, including rumours that the sky blues would not even be able to field a team, Man & Woman City got their season off to a modest start. Outclassed for much of the match, they generally held their shape well and produced some encouraging moments for their travelling supporters.

Buoyed by the late inclusions of Robin and Weaver, paperwork was rushed through in time for a team of 6 to take the field, affording City the luxury of a substitute. The Diamond lads dominated possession throughout, but never more tellingly than in the opening five minutes when it seemed that only Demarchi was able to maintain any sort of control for the blues.

Indeed it was the Brazilian international who struck against the run of play to give the dual genders an unlikely early lead. Diamonds' response was swift and sharp as they piled on several unanswered goals in reply. Several timely interventions by Weaver who had positioned himself beautifully stemmed the flow of goals and paved the way for more blue attacks.

A rare moment of fluid passing saw the blues fashion another chance before Punton was on hand to bundle in Demarchi's cross for a well earned second goal. Laura Jackson let the ball run before launching home City's third and final goal before half time.

A bright beginning to the second half saw Demarchi execute a delicious back heeled finish to Kevin Jackson's cross, despite being double teamed. Meanwhile the blue defense was doing some doubling up of its own, with Robin, Punton and Weaver successfully blunting several dangerous moves.

A horror passage was to follow though as their opponents stamped their authority on the game, putting it well out of reach with five or six goals in quick succession affording them a matchwinning buffer. Kevin Jackson netted a couple of late consolation goals after a clever chip from his Brazilian team mate and his wife Laura rounded off the blues' scoring with a fine finish to a pass again supplied by Demarchi.

Late in the game Mike stopped weaving and launched a thunderbolt just over the crossbar after a foray forward. Punton's sharp reflexes in goal restricted the scoreboard to an almost respectable total; the men in black running out 7-13 winners.

After the game Demarchi praised his teams' organisation. "We won't beat a team like that" he conceded, "but we could improve a bit". When pressed, Goalkeeping hero Punton credited his lightening reflexes to his days spent honing them as a slips fieldsman. Weaver, one of City's three internationally bred talents hinted that there is more to come from him, insinuating that he is not yet at peak fitness. Judging by his impressive performance tonight, opposition forwards will do well to take heed.

Robin shrugged off suggestions that playing against adult males would present her with any difficulties. "I've had rougher matches at MLIS" she said after turning in a fine first performance in blue. Despite netting twice, Laura Jackson was not satisfied with her contribution. Slippery shoes and a first indoor outing combined to frustrate the American who still managed to excel which can only be encouraging for all three of the blues' supporters this evening.

Think you can write a better article? Of course you can! Send it to krjackson@gmail.com. Make it funny, serious, cynical or controversial - it's all about having some fun as a team!